YOUR AREA AND WHAT IT SAYS ABOUT YOU - SLOUGH EDITION
I guarantee most of you will be offended…
1. Slough (Central)
Let’s start with central Slough, the hustling, bustling hub of the town – or at least it was 20 years ago when the Slough High Street was full of fun things to do and local entertainment!
Save for a few great restaurants at the end of the high street, central Slough is as mind-numbingly plain as the dozens of new-build apartment blocks going up!
Your idea of a great night out: heading out of Slough to find fun things to do in London or entertainment ideas in Reading.
What kind of car you drive: an e-scooter because parking is too expensive!
Your perfect meal: a romantic, intimate steak dinner at Steakout Slough
2. Wexham
Ah Wexham.
With easy access to Wexham Park Hospital, and the historic landmark known to locals as ‘little Tesco’, depending on who you ask, Wexham is either ‘full or character’, or ‘full of characters to avoid’!
Your idea of a great night out: an escape room at Bust Out 360 on Wexham Road - if you’re looking for date ideas, party ideas or things to do in half term, an escape room is the perfect choice!
What kind of car you drive: judging by the amount of driving instructor cars seen hobbling around the Normans, anything with an L plate
Your perfect meal: double-fried wings from Roxy Chicken (secret menu hack – thank us later)
3. Cippenham
If boring suburbia is what you’re looking for, you’ve definitely found it!
Miles away from the rest of civilisation, Cippenham residents identify themselves into three distinct factions – those who live ‘near Asda’, those ‘near Mercian Way Park’ and those ‘in the Barratt homes’.
Your idea of a great night out: never mind any specific entertainment spots – any park bench with some drinks from the Londis will do!
What kind of car you drive: Skoda Octavias, Ford Focuses, people carriers – anything sensible and great for kids
Your perfect meal: definitely either the McDonalds in Asda or the McDonalds drive-through on Bath Road
4. Manor Park
Don’t let the name fool you, you won’t find many parks or luscious green gardens, for Manor Park residents prefer their air full of petrol fumes, cramming cars into every available inch!
Your idea of a great night out: the weekly unofficial car-meet on Farnham Road
What kind of car you drive: anything German, tuned and LOUD. If you don’t startle half your road when you drive around, do you even own a car?
Your perfect meal: a fresh home-cooked meal with only the finest ingredients from Sabar Bros
5. Langley
Despite the pretentious parents and egotistical grammar school kids (Herschel Grammar students would never…), Langley is actually one area in Slough where you actually wouldn’t mind living and raising your family in.
Your idea of a great night out: is there even any entertainment in Langley? Might as well also head to the escape rooms…
What kind of car you drive: BMW 5-Series, Mercedes E-Class – whatever screams ‘middle class’
Your perfect meal: anything from the food capital of Langley – Trelawney Avenue
6. Chalvey
The area that requires no introduction as its reputation precedes it…
Aside from Mithai Box, Chalvey Supermarket and the legendary Rotinaan Wala, most Slough residents try to avoid Chalvey where possible.
Your idea of a great night out: standing out on Chalvey Road West with your mates
What kind of car you drive: either a Golf R, or a normal Golf with an R badge stuck on it
Your perfect meal: the mixed donor from K’s Kebabs is unrivalled…
That’s our list – don’t take it personally, we’ve tried to mock each area equally!